


You're in Sync With my Heart

by everyshootingstar



Series: this was all like a dream in my head [2]
Category: The Old Guard (Movie 2020)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Angst with a Happy Ending, Blood Drinking, Blowjobs, Clothes Sharing, Cock Warming, Come Marking, Domesticity, Knotting, M/M, Minor Angst, Rough Sex, Scenting, Switching, mouth knotting
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-10
Updated: 2020-12-10
Packaged: 2021-03-10 03:02:04
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 12,920
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27987396
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/everyshootingstar/pseuds/everyshootingstar
Summary: “Nicolò,” Joe murmurs, sounding hoarse. “Nicolò, I know it’s only been two weeks—” he pauses, and there’s a sound, something low and rumbly, like a growl, “But I fear I’m going into another rut. It’s only just started, so I could probably make other arrangements if needed, but I thought I’d call you first.”He sits straight up the second he hears Joe’s voice, gripping the armrest of his desk chair, “Joe,” he says softly, “Yusuf, are you alright? Is it common for you to go into a second rut in one month?” he asks, listening to Joe’s unsteady breathing. “Are you in pain?”Yusuf goes into another rut and then there are feelings.
Relationships: Joe | Yusuf Al-Kaysani/Nicky | Nicolò di Genova
Series: this was all like a dream in my head [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2049840
Comments: 31
Kudos: 259





	You're in Sync With my Heart

**Author's Note:**

> title comes from [this song](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f4a-2RG-u8U)
> 
> hello all, long time no see right? so, I remember I said I'd write a second part to and of lust we are reborn? :) well yknow ;) here it is ;) 
> 
> im gonna be real with y'all. i'm awaiting results of my covid test and im feeling kinda really bad right now so i'll admit i just finished this, gave it a lil read over and i'm throwing it to the ether. please tell me if there's any major errors you see because my brain is very tired. 
> 
> i do hope you enjoy though and feel free to check out my tumblr at [boulangerlee](https://boulangerlee.tumblr.com) and peep at my pinned post just in case.

The call from Joe comes unexpectedly, not that hearing from Joe was unexpected, despite their agreement, they had become somewhat friends these past few months; but, the _call_ was unexpected, something not usually done unless it was approaching time for Joe’s rut or Nicky’s feeding for the month.

He blinks, watching as the phone stops vibrating on the table and the screen goes dark—it doesn’t ring again and Nicky feels something weird in his stomach as he reaches out to grab his phone, quickly pulling up Joe’s contact information. Worry, maybe? Is he worried? It’s only been a few weeks since their last meeting—since Nicky’s last feeding and Joe’s last rut. _Surely,_ Joe’s not going through another rut already.

Nicky exhales and makes himself comfortable in his desk chair, pressing the phone to his ear as he listens to it ring.

“ _Nicolò,_ ” Joe murmurs, sounding hoarse. “Nicolò, I know it’s only been two weeks—” he pauses, and there’s a sound, something low and rumbly, like a growl, “But I fear I’m going into another rut. It’s only just started, so I could probably make other arrangements if needed, but I thought I’d call you first.”

He sits straight up the second he hears Joe’s voice, gripping the armrest of his desk chair, “Joe,” he says softly, “Yusuf, are you alright? Is it common for you to go into a second rut in one month?” he asks, listening to Joe’s unsteady breathing. “Are you in pain?”

There’s a laugh, something soft and fond, “I’m alright, Nicky. The full moon is this weekend and sometimes this happens, not all the time, but I assure you, this is like any other rut of mine.” He goes quiet for a moment, “I’ve missed your voice,” he admits softly as Nicky holds his phone tighter, pressing it harder against his ear as if that’d close the distance between the two of them.

“I see,” Nicky murmurs back, “I’ve missed yours too, Yusuf,” he reaches closes his eyes and breathes in softly, “Give me two hours and I’ll be there,” he whispers. “I’ll bring dinner, like usual. I need to email my boss and tie up a few ends on my last project, but I’ll be to you in only a few short hours, alright?”

Joe does growl this time, loud enough for the phone speaker to catch, the sound happy and content, “I’ll be waiting,” he says quietly. “Let yourself in when you get here, alright?”

Nicky hums in agreement, “I will,” he says. “Why don’t you go take a nice, long bath while you wait, hm? It will help you relax until I get there.”

As Joe murmurs something in agreement, he hears the sound of Joe moving around his apartment, the sound of doors opening and closing and then, water running, Joe’s low sigh as the heated water makes his bathroom steamy and warm. “Until you get here,” he murmurs, sounding slightly dazed. “Bring something that smells like you,” he adds. “Maybe that hoodie of yours that you’re so fond of.” He says with a grin in his voice.

Nicky laughs softly, “As you wish,” he says. “I’ll see you soon, Yusuf.”

Joe makes a noise, “Nicolò.”

======

Tying up the loose ends of his project and emailing his boss about his upcoming absence takes longer than he expects, so he’s in a rush to gather the clothes he’ll need (even though he spends most of Joe’s ruts in Joe’s clothes), packing his laptop as well, so he can work his way though his backlogged work emails while Joe’s rut isn’t too bad.

It’s just after dusk when he arrives to Joe’s door, a bag of takeout in one hand as he fishes his keys out of his pocket to unlock Joe’s door, letting himself in quietly, knowing Joe’s heard him from the moment he arrived at the door.

“Joe?” he calls out as he steps out of his shoes and moves further into the apartment, heading towards the kitchen to place the food down— “Joe, I’ve brought food!”

He looks around the kitchen, listens for any signs of movement, before he’s moving through the apartment, checking the living room and Joe’s bedroom, “Joe?” he calls out again.

A noise comes from the bathroom then, a soft snuffle, the sound of water sloshing around and a low, groggy, “Nicky?”

Something fond grips Nicky’s heart then and he pushes his way into the bathroom, “Hey there sleepy head,” he says softly, keeping his voice low as he kneels down by the tub. “I see you’re all relaxed, yeah?”

Joe turns his head towards Nicky’s voice, eyes still closed as a beautiful smile crosses his face, “When did you get here?” he asks, “Didn’t hear you come in.”

Nicky hums and reaches out, running his fingers through Joe’s hair, “I just got in,” he murmurs. “There’s food from our favorite takeout place if you’re interested.” He rests the back of his hand against Joe’s forehead, “It’s not too bad right now, right?”

When Joe opens his eyes, they’re very faintly glowing, the low bathroom light catching on the brown of his irises and making them look almost molten, “It’s not bad yet,” he mumbles in agreement, “But I think I need you to smell less like the outside world right now.”

“Of course,” Nicky says, letting his hand stray from Joe’s hair to instead cup his cheek, “Let’s get you out of here first and I’ll take a shower. Sound good?”

Joe turns his head into Nicky’s hand, sighing and mumbling something against his palm, hand coming up to grip Nicky’s wrist tightly, “I’ll get you something to wear,” he murmurs louder, before letting go of Nicky’s wrist.

Nicky smiles softly, “Of course you will,” he says, leaning in and pressing a kiss to Joe’s forehead. “Come on now, I doubt that water’s warm anymore,” he stands, gently taking Joe’s hand and tugging him.

A grumble, but Joe stands as well, stepping out of the bathtub and letting Nicky wrap him up in a warm towel, “There we go,” he says. “You’re very wet,” he teases, though he presses himself against Joe’s chest, briefly breathing in his scent. “But you smell very nice,” he mumbles.

Joe holds the towel around his body, letting Nicky press several kisses into the hollow of his throat, “You’re going to start something, Nicolò,” he warns softly.

Pulling away, Nicky grins at Joe, “Not right now I’m not,” he says, “Go get me something to change into, will you?” he asks, “And put on some clothes as well. We’ll eat once I’m done in the shower.” He turns away from Joe, moving to drain the tub of the cold water.

Joe watches him, watches how _at ease_ Nicky is in his home and he feels something akin to _love_ grip his heart, “Huh,” he says, mostly to himself. “I’ll leave you something on the sink,” he murmurs, holding the towel tighter around his body as he leaves the bathroom, leaving Nicky to wash the smell of the world off of himself.

======

Nicky emerges from the shower not too long later, toweling his hair dry as he walks down the hallway towards the kitchen; despite the fuss he puts up, albeit playfully, Joe’s clothes are _extremely_ comfortable and being surrounded by the other man’s scent is something that makes Nicky _incredibly_ happy.

“I knew my pants would fit you,” Joe says as Nicky steps into the kitchen and Nicky lets the towel drop down to rest across his shoulders, damp hair falling around his face in a shaggy sort of halo.

“Uh huh,” Nicky says dryly, glancing down at the way the gray sweatpants stretch tightly across his thighs, “If you had to see the wiggling I did to get into these, you’d think different.” He comments as he moves closer to Joe, easily stepping into his embrace.

Joe’s hands drop down to rest on Nicky’s ass, a low and pleased rumble in his chest as he cups him, “Well, I can definitely appreciate your effort,” he comments, nuzzling just behind Nicky’s ear. “Seeing you in my clothes settles my wolf,” he murmurs with a secret sort of smile. 

Nicky snorts softly, “Possessive bastard,” he teases, resting his palms against Joe’s chest, fingers pressing into the soft black material covering him, “You’re wearing my hoodie, I see. We’re really embracing the clothes switching, huh?”

“I’d never be that shameless,” Joe says, rolling his eyes. “It just happened to be lying around and I grabbed the first thing I could find.”

“Ah, so you grabbed my hoodie, out of my bag in the kitchen because it was the first thing you could find?” Nicky asks, “Seems plausible, I guess.”

Joe pulls back from scenting Nicky’s throat, a grin on his lips, “I’m glad we agree,” he says as he slides both of his hands up to rest on Nicky’s lower back instead, a soft look on his face. “I really am glad you’re here, Nicky,” he murmurs.

Nicky smiles gently, cupping the side of Joe’s neck, “All you ever have to do is call,” he whispers, dragging the pad of his thumb across the sensitive skin, licking his lips when he feels a shudder travel through Joe’s body. “We should really eat now though,” he adds, watching the way Joe’s pupils dilate, the faint glow getting brighter. “Otherwise, you’re going to be very hungry.”

A growl escapes Joe’s mouth, “And if I said I was already hungry?” he asks, pulling Nicky’s body tighter against his.

“I’d say you should probably let me go so I can feed you properly,” Nicky says with a little laugh, “Before you do something silly, like eat _me_.”

Joe growls again, pressing his face into Nicky’s throat, “Now _there’s_ an idea,” he mutters, letting Nicky’s fingers work their way into his hair, palm curved around the back of his head, _cradling_ him gently.

“Nicky,” he mumbles as his shoulders relax, feeling warm and content and happy. “Nicky, will you fuck me? Before my rut starts?”

Nicky scratches gently at Joe’s scalp, feeling the remaining tension in his body leave, leaning all of his weight between the marble behind him and Nicky’s solidness in front of him, “It may take a while,” he murmurs, “To get me to that point, but I’d be amicable to taking care of you.” He rests his cheek against the top of Joe’s head, letting the other man mouth at his throat, tasting him, “I have no doubt you could get me there, though.” He says with a private sort of smile.

Joe hums, mouth opening wider, the press of sharp canines against Nicky’s skin, “Nicolò,” he mumbles, “Making you feel pleasure is my one goal when we’re together, no matter the reason.”

“You certainly know how to do that,” Nicky agrees softly, tilting his head to the side, “But now you’re just trying to distract me while I’m trying to feed you properly,” he mumbles, tugging at Joe’s hair the tiniest amount. “So I’m going to push you away and table this conversation for now but we’re going to come back to it once I’ve gotten proper food in you.”

He whines, low and sad but lets Nicky pull away and put distance between the two of them, and though he pouts the smallest amount as he seats himself on a barstool, he doesn’t complain, just watches Nicky move around his kitchen with the ease of someone who’s lived here for a while.

(And _wow_ , isn’t that a thought? Nicky _living_ here, _with_ Joe. Their scents mingling together in every nook of the apartment, Nicky’s things taking up the excess space between Joe’s, _Nicky_ taking up the excess space in Joe’s _heart_.)

A plate is placed in front of him and a bottle of water, along with utensils and then Nicky’s sliding onto the barstool beside him with his own plate and water, pressing his knee against Joe’s as he picks his fork up, “Eat,” he murmurs gently, making a show of taking a bite of the food off of his plate.

Joe does, slow and almost mechanical, each bite he takes filling him along with the press of Nicky’s knee to his, the scent of the other man _here,_ in his home, _taking care of him_.

Nicky watches patiently, only finishing his own food out of habit, and though it does nothing for him, his favorite thing has always been sharing a meal with Joe, who enjoys food, who makes enjoying food so _beautiful_ —even now as he’s sinking further into the countertop, pushing bites between his lips with the utmost care; Nicky can tell he enjoys the food, enjoys that _Nicky’s_ the one who brought it to him.

When Joe finishes, he takes a moment to drain most of the bottle of water, wiping the back of his hand across his mouth as he places the now empty bottle back onto the counter, “Nicky?” he asks.

Nicky smiles and stands up, leaning over to press a kiss into Joe’s hair as he grabs their dishes and trash, cleaning everything up, “If you want to go ahead and go to the bedroom,” he says, “I’ll be there in a moment, once I’ve put the leftovers away.”

Joe hums and stands, moves across the kitchen to drape himself over Nicky’s back as he moves the food into storage containers, “But what if I want to stay with you?” he mumbles into Nicky’s shoulder, into _his_ t-shirt, that stretches so nicely across Nicky’s shoulders.

Nicky leans into Joe for a moment, “Then I guess you’re staying with me,” he murmurs. “I don’t mind, Yusuf. I like when you’re with me.”

A whine escapes Joe’s throat, “You’re too good for me,” he says, words muffled by the shirt, by Nicky’s shoulder, “You’ve brought me food and now you’re moving around in my apartment like you _live_ here.” He makes a low, tortured sound, “It’s so much, Nicky.”

“You’d do the same for me,” Nicky murmurs as he finishes closing the last container. “You take care of me when I need it. Let me take care of you when you need it, Yusuf.”

Joe moves with Nicky as he shuffles towards the refrigerator, easily handling Joe’s extra weight as he pulls it open and bends a little to place the containers onto one of the shelves.

When he doesn’t say anything, Nicky closes the refrigerator and turns, gathering Joe into his arms, “You’re feeling a lot right now because it’s the beginning of a rut,” he murmurs, rubbing across Joe’s upper back, “And the full moon is later this week which is only making things worse,” he presses a kiss against Joe’s temple, his lips dry and slightly cool. “I feel the same way whenever I’m going through my monthly hunger,” he whispers. “I just _need_ so much, and I’ve been so lucky to find you. To find the one man who’s able to fulfill all my needs. Who knows exactly what to do for me.” He pulls back some so he can look at Joe, at the way his pupils are a little more dilated than they were before, “And I know exactly what you need right now, Joe,” he whispers, cupping a gentle palm against the side of his neck, his cooler skin a direct contrast to Joe’s own overheated skin. “Let’s go to bed, alright?”

Joe’s hands grip Nicky’s hips, his face nudging its way under Nicky’s jaw, a soft snuffle leaving him, “Take me to bed, please,” he mumbles, giving himself a moment to breathe Nicky in before he steps back, putting just enough space between the two of them so they can walk without tripping over each other.

Nicky hums, crowding Joe in front of him, down the hall and towards the bedroom, pushing Joe against the door and leaning up into his space, pressing his mouth against Joe’s for the first time that night.

Eager hands grip onto Nicky’s shirt, holding tight to keep him close as the kiss deepens into something downright _filthy_ ; Nicky’s hand curling around the side of Joe’s throat, holding him as he pushes deeper into the kiss, feeling the way Joe’s pulse beats heavily against his thumb.

When they part, Joe’s panting and his face is flushed, his lower lip oozing blood from where Nicky’s fang had nicked it—he’s beautifully disheveled and something in Nicky’s mind whispers possessively as Joe’s glowing eyes find his.

“Let’s get you on the bed before I feel tempted to have you right here,” Nicky whispers, pressing a kiss over the bloody cut on Joe’s lower lip, feeling a warmth go through him at the taste of Joe’s blood as Joe makes an urgent noise, reaching down to clumsily turn the handle to the bedroom door, letting Nicky guide him back into the room, to the bed.

“Off,” Nicky mumbles, tugging Joe’s pants down over his hips once he has him laying on the bed; gently pushing Joe back against the bed when he goes to pull the hoodie off, “Keep it on,” he says, “I want it to smell like you,” he licks his lips, still tasting Joe’s blood on his tongue, “Stay like this,” he pats Joe’s thigh for a moment, “Let me just get…” he trails off, slipping off the bed and going to dig through the nightstand for lube. 

Nicky pauses for a moment at the end of the bed, taking in _Joe_ who’s laying on the bed, flushed and panting still—his dick hard and curved up towards his stomach; only the lower half of his body uncovered, “Oh, what a lovely picture you make right now,” he murmurs, “All wrapped up in my hoodie, wanting for me,” he grins, crawling up, up, _up_ onto the bed until he’s kneeling between Joe’s splayed thighs.

“ _Nicolò_ ,” Joe mumbles, reaching up and cupping his face, “Let me help you, let me get you ready,” he leans up, brushing his lips against Nicky’s, “Please, I want to touch you, I want to feel you.”

Nicky hums and presses a firm kiss to Joe’s mouth, “Let me finger you while you do that?” he murmurs, their lips barely parting, “Even if I make you come, I’ll still fuck you.”

Joe’s moan is all the answer Nicky needs, pulling back from the kiss to grin down at him, “Lay on top of me,” he murmurs, rolling over onto his back beside Joe. “C’mon,” he nudges Joe’s thigh until he moves, until he’s kneeling over his chest. “That’s it,” he whispers, feeling Joe’s fingers gently nudge his soft dick. “Mm, I like when you touch me.”

Joe huffs quietly, resting his forehead briefly against Nicky’s thigh, breathing him in where his scent’s the strongest, “I like you even when you stay mostly soft,” he mumbles back, rubbing his beard against the sensitive skin in the crease of Nicky’s thigh. “Feels like I’ve really gotta work for it if I want you inside me.”

Nicky shivers, humming softly as his palms cup Joe’s cheeks, kneading the flesh slowly, “It’s all for you,” he murmurs. “You’re the only one who gets me like this,” he adds, lightly grazing his thumb between his cheeks. “Do you like that?” he asks, feeling Joe’s shaky exhale against his soft dick. “Use your mouth, lovely one. Warm me up?”

Nicky’s moan is low and long, his touch going distracted as Joe’s mouth closes warm and wet over his dick, his hips jerk up against Joe’s mouth, “ _Oh_ ,” he breathes out, digging his nails briefly into Joe’s skin, “You’re doing such a good job, Yusuf,” he whispers, swiping his thumb in a maddening pattern across his hole, slow and careful, working at the muscle until Joe hums around Nicky, subtly pushing into his touch.

Joe’s mouth is warm and wet and Nicky’s head feels hazy already, his entire body _singing_ with need as he presses a now lube covered finger against Joe’s hole, the muscle tensing for a moment before Joe _relaxes_ and Nicky’s finger sinks into him with a low, muffled groan.

“Aren’t you lovely,” Nicky murmurs, biting his lower lip briefly, watching mesmerized at the way Joe clenches around his finger, “You need this, don’t you? You need something inside you when you’re like this.” He takes a moment to carefully curl his finger, delighting in the way Joe’s whole body tenses again moment, another muffled noise leaving his mouth.

It goes on like this, for how long, Joe’s unsure, his mind going sluggish and hazy as he lets Nicky finger him, as he carefully holds Nicky’s dick in his mouth, focusing only of the feel of Nicky, of his _scent_ until he can’t _take_ it—

Joe’s mouth leaves Nicky so he can press his forehead against Nicky’s thigh, breathing hard and heavy against the sensitive skin there, mouth opened in a soundless noise as Nicky’s fingers slowly, _maddeningly_ work him open, one at a time.

“Nicky,” Joe mumbles with a gasp when Nicky presses two fingers into him, “Fuck, you’re driving me mad,” he says, managing to turn his head enough so he can press kisses against the side of Nicky’s still soft dick. “Nicky, please, I need you so much. I need to feel you.” He’s begging, he realizes somewhat distantly as he’s rocking back against Nicky’s fingers. “S’not enough.”

Nicky shushes him, petting his thigh with his free hand, “I’m going to take care of you, Yusuf,” he promises softly, “I need you to take care of me too, though. I want to fuck you, dear Yusuf, but I need to be hard to do that.”

Joe groans again, the sound coming out more of a growl as he nudges Nicky’s legs further apart, “I know,” he says, somewhat petulantly, “Doesn’t mean I can’t want it _now_ though,” he mumbles, arching his back when Nicky’s fingers brush over his prostate, “You’re purposely being a little shit,” he says. “I should have you first. Me fucking you never fails to make you hard,” he bites at the crease of his thigh, feeling the way Nicky’s muscles jump under his mouth.

Nicky just hums, somewhat distractedly and nudges the lube down towards Joe, “If you need it,” he says off handedly, pressing a heel into the bed, “I’m yours to do whatever with, dear Yusuf,” he murmurs, leaning up to kiss the back of Joe’s thigh.

Joe makes a noise, fumbles for the lube and squeezes some out onto his fingers, mouthing messily over the bite mark in the crease of Nicky’s thigh as he presses a slick finger further down between Nicky’s legs, the digit passing messily over his hole several times before _finally_ sinking inside, Nicky’s pleased sigh loud in the quiet of the bedroom.

“Guess I’m not the only one who likes having something inside, huh?” Joe mumbles, only teasing Nicky with one finger long enough to get him used to the feeling before he sinks another inside him, knowing the vampire likes the stretch, the brief flash of pain before his body relaxes into it.

Nicky opens his mouth to say something, but he’s silenced when Joe’s mouth sinks back over his dick, a moan tearing from his throat as he sinks into the dual sensation of Joe’s mouth and his fingers, working in tandem.

“I never said I didn’t like it,” he manages after some time, when he’s three fingers deep in Joe and the werewolf is pressing back against him urgently, “I _love_ having your fingers in me. You’re the only one I get hard from,” he admits, feeling completely wrung out already. “Your fingers, your mouth—you’re _perfect_ , Joe. Absolutely perfect for me, Yusuf.” He pets over Joe’s thigh, up across his ass, his lower back—shoving the hoodie further up his back, digging his nails into the dimples there, “You’re so good to me, you take such good care of me when I’m with you,” he presses his head back into the bed, eyes fluttering closed. “Even now, sweet one, you’re taking such good care of me while I’m taking care of you.”

Joe groans loudly around Nicky who’s now _half-_ hard, curling his fingers enthusiastically inside Nicky while he swallows him down until his nose is pressed snug against his pubes where Nicky’s scent is so _concentrated_ it makes his own dick twitch heavily where it’s curving up against his stomach.

When Joe manages to squeeze a third finger in with the first two, just as Nicky’s pressing in a _fourth_ , he’s not sure who moans louder—but Nicky’s dick twitches against his tongue, hardens even more as Joe’s fingers fuck into him almost _too_ rough, pressing maddeningly against his prostate, Nicky’s rhythm faltering until his grip goes slack on Joe’s thigh.

“Joe,” Nicky says, _groans_ out as he shoves his fingers into Joe several more times, stretching and curling them, “Joe, that’s enough—” he pauses, moans and digs his heel into the bed, “Joe, _Yusuf,_ you’ve got to stop or I’m going to come,” he _whines_.

At Nicky’s words, Joe pulls back, removes his fingers and lets Nicky’s dick slide out of his mouth; now hard and curved against his belly, “ _Fuck_ ,” he mumbles. “Can I have it now, Nicky?” he asks, leaning down to nuzzle his hip, to mouth over the slowly fading bruise his teeth had left behind. “Give it to me, _please_?”

Joe’s mostly aware when Nicky suddenly removes his fingers and gently nudges at his hip until he’s sprawled out on the bed beside him, his cheeks are flushed and he’s given up on even _trying_ to act like he’s patient, fingers tugging and pulling at Nicky until he’s kneeling between his spread thighs, Joe’s hand wrapped firmly around his dick as he coats him with lube, “Please Nicolò,” Joe murmurs, canting his hips up as he guides the head of Nicky’s dick right where he wants it.

Nicky fists his hand in the front of the hoodie, pulling Joe up for a messy kiss, his hips snapping forward as he fucks into Joe in one smooth movement, catching Joe’s shout as he deepens the kiss—fucking him with quick, sharp thrusts.

Joe’s arms go around Nicky’s shoulders, holding onto him tightly as each thrust pushes him up the bed, rocking him to his core each time Nicky brushes against his prostate—and when Nicky’s hand goes around Joe’s dick, fisting tightly at the base where his knot’s starting to inflate—he shouts again, dropping back against the bed as he comes suddenly as Nicky’s fist tightens around his knot, carefully milking him even as he keeps fucking him through it.

When Joe grabs at Nicky’s wrist and pulls his hand away, hissing with oversensitivity, Nicky leans down to press a kiss to his mouth as he shuffles back, his dick slipping out of Joe, “I want to mark you,” Nicky whispers, wrapping his fist around himself.

Joe whines a little, hooking his foot around the back of Nicky’s thigh to pull him closer again, “Do it,” he murmurs, “Make me yours, Nicky. I want to smell like you,” he licks his lips, looking up at Nicky through half-lidded, tired eyes.

Nicky chokes out a moan, curling in on himself as his hand moves faster, shuddering heavily when Joe’s nails drag down his chest, catching over his sensitive nipples and he grips Joe’s thigh tightly, “ _Yusuf_ ,” he gasps out before going quiet, his release mixing with Joe’s on his stomach.

As he shudders through the aftershocks, Joe carefully drags Nicky down beside him, letting the vampire curl into his side—the sound of Nicky’s rapidly beating heart loud in his ears as the two of them catch their breaths.

“Didn’t mean to come so soon,” Nicky mumbles sometime later, voice muffled in Joe’s shoulder, “Didn’t _expect_ it to just. Happen like that.”

Joe snorts softly, nudging Nicky’s temple with his nose, “I take it as the highest compliment,” he murmurs, “And don’t worry. Later on, we’ll throw in a cock ring and keep you hard for _hours_ ,” he presses a kiss to the sweaty skin there. “Making you come is my absolute favorite thing, even if you’ve barely fucked me,” he grins.

Nicky huffs and slaps at Joe’s chest, “Don’t be an asshole,” he mumbles. “Let me catch my breath and I’ll be ready to go again if you’d like,” he pushes himself up so he can look down at Joe.

“Maybe,” Joe says, sitting up so he can finally pull Nicky’s hoody off, tossing it onto the chair across the room, “But, much later, because right now I want to cuddle with you,” he says, nudging Nicky’s shoulder.

Glancing down at the mess on Joe’s stomach, he hums, “Let me just…” he trails off, reaching out to rub the come into Joe’s skin, lower lip caught between his teeth as he focuses, feeling the way Joe’s breathing stutters, “Perfect. Now you smell like me,” he murmurs, grinning up at Joe, cheeks flushed.

Joe, unable to help himself, throws himself at Nicky, tackling him down onto the bed, “You are the _worst_ ,” he mumbles, pressing his lips against Nicky’s. “I need to sleep, I can feel the rut coming _soon_ , and you need to sleep,” he presses a kiss against the corner of Nicky’s mouth, then one to the hinge of his jaw, inhaling softly when Nicky tilts his head back, “You’re going to need the rest,” he whispers, scraping his teeth over the sensitive skin of Nicky’s throat, feeling the vampire shiver under him. “Especially once I’m through with you.” 

“Is that a promise?” Nicky mumbles somewhat cockily, feeling hazy now that’s he under Joe, surrounded by Joe’s scent again.

Joe laughs quietly and mouths at the hollow of Nicky’s throat, biting him there with dulled teeth until Nicky’s fingers claw at Joe’s back and Joe has to pull away so he doesn’t go _too far_.

“Sleep,” Nicky says, sounding breathless again, though his heart isn’t beating as fast as it was anymore. “We should rest now. Sleep.” He shifts until he can turn onto his side, until Joe’s dislodged from his place over Nicky, “Come on, Yusuf,” he says, tugging at Joe’s arm until the werewolf gets the hint and curls around Nicky’s back.

With his hips nestled snug against Nicky’s ass, Joe hums happily, pressing a kiss to the back of his neck, “This is quite the position to sleep in,” he murmurs, “Especially with a werewolf so close to a rut,” he teases drowsily.

Nicky hums, pulls Joes arm tighter around him, “I’m aware,” he murmurs back. “Now sleep and maybe we can put this position to use in the morning.”

Joe playfully bites at the back of Nicky’s neck before he settles in, falling asleep almost immediately with their scents surrounding him.

=====

Nicky’s halfway through plating his and Joe’s breakfast when Joe drags his feet into the kitchen—half asleep and grumpy looking as he makes a beeline for Nicky, plastering himself against the vampire’s back, burying his face against the t-shirt he’s wearing.

“Where did you go?” he mumbles, trying to puzzle out if anything about Nicky’s scent is out of place. “You weren’t in bed when I woke up.”

Placing the pan down, he turns, his arms going around Joe’s shoulders, “I’ve been in the kitchen the whole time,” he murmurs, pressing a kiss to Joe’s hair. “Checking some work emails I hadn’t caught up on. Waiting for you to wake up so I could feed you.”

Joe perks up a little, nuzzling his way under Nicky’s jaw, “Did you at least make coffee?” he mumbles, mouthing there, making Nicky’s scent _thicker_.

Nicky laughs, tilting his head back further as Joe presses several kisses along his throat, “I did,” he murmurs, “I know how you are when you haven’t had coffee,” he brings a hand up, tangling his fingers in Joe’s hair. “How do you feel, dear one?”

“Better now that you’re here,” Joe manages between kisses before he settles his face in the crook of Nicky’s shoulder and neck, hunching his shoulders a little so he fits snug in Nicky’s arms, “You make everything better, Nicolò.”

Something warm and fond takes Nicky by surprise and he squeezes Joe tighter, “You make everything better too, Yusuf,” he mumbles, resting his cheek against the top of Joe’s head, “How long until your rut hits now?”

Joe makes a soft noise, “Sometime today,” he mumbles, “It’s right under my skin and it’s making me feel on edge,” he turns his head a little, breathing wetly against Nicky’s skin. “My wolf is telling me to claim you,” he admits softly, hands gripping Nicky’s hips. “To just push you down and take you until you admit you’re mine.”

Nicky shivers, rubbing his cheek against Joe’s hair, closing his eyes as he takes a deep, steadying breath, “Don’t you think you should eat first?” he murmurs, rubbing Joe’s upper back, “You’ll need your strength.”

Joe half growls, half groans, “I know you’re right, but I just want to _bathe_ in your scent,” he mumbles. “And you’re wearing my clothes too. It just makes me _want_ so much.”

“It’s become something familiar to you, right?” Nicky says as he carefully untangles himself from Joe, nudging him to sit on one of the stools by the counter. “Me wearing your clothes, I mean. When we’re together, I wear your clothes because I know it helps when I carry your scent.” He places a plate of food in front of Joe, along with a bottle of water, “And you recognize me as _yours_ when I wear your clothes.” He moves to stand behind Joe, wrapping his arms around his shoulders, “It’s the same way you give yourself over to me when I need you.” He presses a kiss to the side of Joe’s throat, just barely scraping the tips of his fangs against his skin. “Now eat, lovely one,” he murmurs as Joe shivers. “You’ll need your strength.”

“Between the two of us I think you’re the tease,” Joe mutters as he digs into the food, feeling content and _complete_ , the voice in his head whispering _mate, mate, mate_ over and over as Nicky’s weight stays against his back while he eats.

=====

Sprawled across Joe’s lap while he answers work emails isn’t quite how Nicky expects to spend the time after breakfast; after the two of them have showered and changed into comfortable lounge clothes—but well, he’s not complaining.

Joe’s been quietly mouthing at the back of his neck for the past thirty minutes and a low simmer of arousal has built in Nicky’s stomach as he stares at his laptop screen, dutifully typing out a reply to an email that required something more than Outlook’s predictable text replies.

“When are you going to be finished?” Joe mumbles as he’s backspacing quite enthusiastically, “Nicky, we’ve been sitting here for hours now,” he bites at the back of his neck with dull, human teeth, making Nicky gasp and tense up. “C’mon Nicky, I need something to take the edge off again.”

Nicky shifts in Joe’s lap, trying to move away from Joe’s mouth, “English isn’t my first, second _or_ third language, so you can imagine how hard this is to type out when I have someone chewing on my neck like I’m a fancy dog toy,” He reaches back and pats the side of Joe’s face, briefly cupping his cheek, “If I give you something will that appease you until I’m finished with the email?” he asks.

Joe makes a happy noise in his throat, nuzzling the side of Nicky’s neck, “ _Please_ ,” he murmurs. “I’ll let you finish the email after that. I should be good until you’re finished, I promise Nicky.”

Nicky easily slides off of Joe’s lap, carefully placing his laptop on the table in front of him, “Don’t make promises you can’t keep, dear one,” he says as he sinks to his knees in front of Joe, “I know your rut is almost here,” he smiles fondly up at Joe, petting across his thighs. “And I’m here too, to take care of you.”

Joe’s warm hands cup Nicky’s cheeks, thumbs stroking the cool skin slowly, reverently, “How have I managed to live this long without you?” he murmurs as Nicky turns his face up into Joe’s touch, eyes fluttering closed, lips half parted, _tempting_ Joe until he leans down and presses a slow, sweet kiss to them, making Nicky hum and push himself up closer.

Nicky’s hands work distractedly to tug at the waistband of Joe’s sweats, the two of them pulling away from the kiss long enough for Joe to lift his hips so Nicky can pull them down properly, letting the material pool around his ankles.

“I think you’ve managed without me just fine,” Nicky finally murmurs back, leaning in to bite at Joe’s lower lip, “Your life is just fuller now that I’m here,” he says smugly, wrapping a hand around Joe’s dick, making the werewolf gasp in surprise at the coolness of his skin.

Joe’s head thumps back against the couch with a low groan, “You’re a menace, Nicky,” he mumbles, shifting and trying to spread his legs wider despite the pants tangled around his ankles—and Nicky, takes pity on him, untangles the pants and then hoists one of Joe’s legs over his shoulder, laughing at the surprised noise that leaves his mouth.

“I’ve got to make sure this lasts you until your rut, don’t I?” Nicky asks cheekily, easily tugging Joe closer to the edge of the couch, “You didn’t think I was going to blow you, did you?” he asks, eyes wide and innocent, “There’s other things I can do with my mouth, lovely one.” He murmurs as he leans down to mouth at Joe’s thighs, “There are _plenty_ of things I could do with my mouth that’ll leave you more satisfied than a simple _blowjob_ ,” he whispers against Joe’s skin, hearing the werewolf _whimper_ above him.

Joe groans a little when he feels the sharp press of Nicky’s fangs against his thigh, “ _Oh_ ,” he breathes out, “You need something from me, baby?” he asks, curling his fingers into Nicky’s hair. “Go ahead and take it, you know I’ll give you this.”

Nicky hums softly, presses a light kiss against his skin before he sinks his teeth in with a low groan as Joe’s fingers tighten in his hair as he takes his fill, the slick sound of Joe’s hand around his dick mixing with the low, quiet sound of Joe whimpering.

When Joe’s thigh flexes under Nicky’s mouth, he pulls back, wiping the back of his hand across his mouth before he carefully licks away the stray drops of blood sliding down Joe’s inner thigh, “You always taste so good,” he murmurs with a happy little hum, nosing his way further towards Joe’s groin now that he’s had his fill, mouth opening against the soft skin in the crease of his thigh, “You smell good as well,” he whispers, “Keep touching yourself for me, Joe.” He glances up at him, taking the way Joe’s got his lower lip caught between his teeth, his eyes half-closed as he tries to look down at Nicky. “Are you going to knot this time?” he whispers.

Joe makes a noise in his throat, pushes his other leg out—the one not on Nicky’s shoulder—as far as he can, “I think I’m close enough that I will,” he mumbles. “Do you want me to knot your mouth again?”

Nicky grins, presses a kiss to the side of his dick, down where his knot is before he’s nosing at his balls, opening his mouth to take one and then the other in for a moment, listening to the soft sounds that leave Joe’s mouth, uninhibited and _beautiful_.

Joe swears loudly when Nicky’s tongue finds his hole, his hand tightening in Nicky’s hair, “Keep touching yourself, Joe,” he whispers as he hoists Joe’s leg up higher on his shoulder and uses his thumbs to spread him open, pressing himself closer to where Joe’s scent is the strongest and most intoxicating.

Joe moans, shifting his hips down against Nicky’s mouth, “Oh babe,” he murmurs, “Babe that feels so good, your mouth is _so good_ ,” he squeezes the base of his dick tight on each downstroke, “Give me a finger too,” he mumbles hazily, a low, happy sound leaving his mouth when a slick finger slips in with Nicky’s tongue.

Nicky hums, curling his finger _just so_ until Joe’s thigh clenches around the side of his head, using the leverage to push himself up off of the couch, “ _Oh_ ,” comes the surprised gasp, the shake in Joe’s thigh a sign he’s _close_ so Nicky doubles down, pulls his finger out and replaces it with _two_ , curling and twisting them as he sucks at Joe’s rim carefully, feeling the way Joe keeps _shaking_ , the low murmurs in Arabic and other languages that Nicky can’t quite catch.

When Joe starts tugging at Nicky’s hair insistently, he pulls back, curling his fingers almost cruelly inside Joe as he bats Joe’s hand off of his dick and swallows him down, lips sealing around the base of where Joe’s knot’s already starting to form.

Joe’s hips completely buck up off of the couch as he shouts, hand tightening in Nicky’s hair, curling his thigh tighter around Nicky’s head as he keeps him there, nose pressed tight against his pubic bone as he comes, babbling Nicky’s name over and over like some sort of prayer.

Nicky is content there, the press of Joe’s thigh around his head, the hand in his hair keeping him snug and comfortable—and he drifts for a bit, only focusing on Joe’s pleasure, on making sure Joe’s warm and satisfied.

“Nicky,” Joe mumbles after some time, the passage of time slow and sluggish in his mind, his jaw aching the tiniest bit where it’d been stretched around his knot; now deflated enough that Nicky can pull back.

(The question is, _does_ Nicky want to pull back? Or does he stay here, with his mouth stretched around Joe, his jaw aching and _aching_ until he can’t stand it, until Joe gets hard again and knots his mouth again, over and over and—)

“Nicolò my love,” Joe mumbles again, insistent as he gently pulls on Nicky’s hair, “Come back to me dear one,” he lets his leg finally drop from Nicky’s shoulder and gently pulls him off of his dick, thumb resting against the hinge of his jaw, rubbing slowly, “Love, are you with me?”

Nicky looks up at Joe, feels _something_ strong in his stomach, his chest, his _everywhere_ and surges up to kiss Joe desperately, passionately as he cups Joe’s jaw, fingers scratching through his beard.

When Joe pulls back, Nicky’s staring at him, his eyes bright and _glowing_ , and this would-be unnerving to anyone other than Joe, but _god_ , Joe loves _everything_ about him, from the way his eyes glow a pretty, pretty pale green when he’s full on blood, to the way he sort of _sinks_ into Joe whenever they’re together like this, when he manages to get Nicky’s walls down so far that Nicky _yields_.

Joe licks his lips and carefully guides Nicky up onto the couch, into the corner so he can curl around him properly, pressing soft kisses to his jaw, murmuring quiet praises into his skin as he pets along Nicky’s arms and down his back.

“I’ve got you, Nicky,” he whispers into his jaw, “You’re so good for me, Nicolò,” he presses a kiss to his skin. “Oh, how good a mate you make for me,” he murmurs, almost inaudible. “I love everything about you, dear one. Your willingness to please, your eagerness, how you’re so _selfless_ with your love and care.” He holds Nicky tighter, pressing another kiss to his skin. “You’ve done so much for me these past few months we’ve known each other. I’d be lost without you.”

He keeps up the steady stream of words, dipping through several languages, talking until Nicky stirs and lifts his head, blinking slowly at Joe, “I don’t think I’m going to finish that email right now,” he mumbles, letting his head drop back down onto Joe’s shoulder. “Went a little deep there now my brain is all silence and I’m too relaxed to actually care about work right now.” He nuzzles Joe’s shirt, “Just want to be here with you for the rest of the time.”

Joe laughs quietly, holding Nicky tighter, “I think the email will be fine for now,” he murmurs, “Do you want to take a nap?”

Nicky hums but shakes his head, “I’m not sleepy, I just need to be close to you right now,” he says softly, “Maybe turn on a movie for now? Some sort of background noise. Once my brain is less…the way it is now, I’ll be back to taking care of you.”

“Oh love,” Joe murmurs, “You’ve already taken such good care of me, you can relax now. The rut has eased back for now, we’ve still got a few hours until it comes.”

Nicky hums again, choosing not to say anything, just nuzzles his face into Joe’s throat and rests there as Joe reaches for the remote control to turn the TV on.

======

“When my rut’s over, you should stay,” Joe mumbles into Nicky’s throat later on that night, the heat settling under his skin has him on edge, calling for him to bury himself in Nicky’s scent as much as possible, to claim, to mark, to _take_.

Nicky laughs quietly, “I took the whole week off to stay with you afterwards, remember?” he murmurs, running his fingers through Joe’s hair, “We know your rut will be over in a couple days and I still have four whole days after, I’ll be here until the effects of the post-rut go away,” he presses his other hand to the center of Joe’s back, palm warmed by Joe’s unnaturally hot skin.

Joe _whines_ , “That’s not what I mean, and you know it,” he mutters, pressing a hot kiss to the skin just under Nicky’s ear. “ _Stay_ with me, Nicolò,” he mumbles, shifting his hips against where he’s pressed against Nicky’s thigh, the hard line of his dick a distinct contrast to where Nicky’s still soft.

“Oh Joe,” Nicky murmurs, turning his head and pressing a kiss to Joe’s temple, “Can we talk about that later, dear one?” he asks softly, almost sad sounding, “I’m not sure if that’s something we should discuss right now.”

Joe lifts his head so he can look at Nicky properly, “Why not?” he asks, taking in the way Nicky’s brows are drawn, the way his lips are slightly turned down at the corners, “Have I done something to make you think I don’t feel anything for you?” he asks, cupping Nicky’s jaw gently, thumb trying to smooth away the frown.

Nicky looks away, curling his hand around Joe’s wrist, “ _Yusuf_ ,” he mumbles, “Can we please talk about this later? After your rut?” he finally looks back up at Joe. “I just think. Maybe we shouldn’t make decisions about things like this while one of us is being controlled by our instincts.”

Joe dips his head down, gently nudging his nose against Nicky’s, “But we will talk about it, right?” he murmurs, feeling Nicky’s hands cup the back of his neck gently, “Don’t think we’re tabling this permanently,” he whispers, dropping a light kiss against Nicky’s mouth.

“We’ll talk about it,” Nicky murmurs, somewhat reluctantly before he’s pulling Joe close again, “Just, hold me for a minute, alright? When you need to take me, I want it like this.” He buries his face in Joe’s hair. “I want to see you.”

Joe presses a kiss to Nicky’s throat, “Like this,” he whispers back, feeling something sad and melancholy settle over him, “Nicky, I didn’t mean—”

Nicky shakes his head, “Don’t apologize, silly,” he says softly, letting his fingertips trail down Joe’s back slowly, “There’s nothing to apologize for, I promise.” He smooths his palms along his soft, warm skin, “We’re going to be alright, Joe.”

Joe lifts his head, “Nicky,” he whispers and then he’s leaning down to kiss him, throwing every ounce of emotion he can into it, Nicky’s fingers clutching at his sides as he kisses back, his legs closing around Joe’s hips, keeping him close.

“Nicky,” Joe mumbles as he pulls away, “Can we…is it alright if we still…” he trails off, touching along Nicky’s face, fingertips pressing against his chin and tilting his head back, his words failing him as he buries his face against Nicky’s throat, mouthing messily at his cool skin.

Nicky shushes Joe, running his fingers across warm skin, “You’ve got me, Joe, you’ve got me,” he mumbles, eyes closed as he tilts his head back further, Joe’s mouth hot and wet as he bites at Nicky’s skin. “ _Yusuf,_ ” he whispers, shuddering, “Yusuf, please take me,” he mumbles, feeling light-headed and drunk on Joe’s scent, the way his skin feels---how _right_ everything feels between them. How well they _fit_.

“I’ve got you,” Joe whispers into the hollow of his collarbones, “I’ve got you Nicky, my Nicolò,” and this time, everything feels different when he finally pushes inside, from the points of Nicky’s nails digging into his skin to the way he _clenches_ around him, the low hiss leaving Nicky’s mouth as Joe starts fucking his hips forward, giving him little time to adjust.

It’s painful and beautiful and _perfect_. Something warm and happy settling into his heart, into place.

=======

They don’t talk about it right away—not once Joe’s rut has ended and they’ve both showered and cleaned everything up. Nicky changes into the clothes Joe offers him, lets him cuddle him and shower him with little kisses and affection.

It’s almost as if nothing had quite changed, really. Nicky’s still amicable, letting Joe interrupt him while he tries to reply to emails, feeds Joe special dishes that he whips up with whatever he can find in Joe’s kitchen—he even lets Joe be the little spoon when they sleep.

All too fast though, the last day comes and Nicky quietly changes back into his clothes, holding the hoodie that Joe had worn on the first day a little bit too tight where it’s wrapped around him, he tries to say something several times but can’t seem to push the words out.

“Nicky,” Joe says softly, pulling the vampire close, burying his face against Nicky’s shoulder, nose pressed against the hoodie as he inhales their combined scents.

Nicky presses a kiss to Joe’s hair, wraps his arms around him tight and holds him for several long moments. “I need to go,” he murmurs finally, “I’m sorry Joe.”

When Nicky slips out of the apartment, the sound of the closing door echoing like an _ending_.

=====

“You’re kind of an idiot,” Andy says patiently, “Towards the end of his rut he asked you to stay and you didn’t want to talk about it so what? You just left?”

Nicky groans, burying his face in his hands, “I stayed until the end of the week, as we agreed. And then I left. But we never talked about it and now it’s been almost a month and I’m pretty sure it’s _too late_ to talk about it.”

Andy stands up from the couch and moves over to where Nicky’s sitting hunched over his desk, rubbing tiredly at his face, “Nicky,” she says softly, the uncharacteristic tone causing Nicky’s hands to leave his face so he can look at her—the dark circles under his eyes so obvious against his pale skin.

“Nicky, out of all the people I’ve saved in my life, you’re the one I’m most fond of,” Andy says, gently cupping his cheeks in her palms, “You’re so stupidly selfless that it almost hurts sometimes that you give so much of yourself to other people.” She rubs her thumb against his cheek slowly, “But you’re hurting yourself and Joe by doing this. Have you tried talking to him since you left? About anything else?”

Nicky shakes his head, pressing his lips together, “I’m almost scared to, Andy,” he whispers. “I know, I shouldn’t be because in the grand scheme of my entire life, this isn’t the worst thing that’s happened to me. I just. The last time I got too close, I almost…”

Andy’s face goes hard, “ _No_ ,” she says sharply, “That won’t happen, not with Joe. Everything about this? About you and Joe? That’s real. You’ve been wearing this hoodie since you got back, it’s the last thing you have that smells like Joe, right?” she asks, pausing until he nods slowly, “The way your scents go together tells me everything I need to know, Nicky and it’s that this won’t end up like last time. Joe won’t hurt you, but right now you _are_ hurting Joe and yourself.”

“How can you be so sure?” Nicky asks somewhat miserably, leaning his forehead heavily against Andy’s stomach, letting her soothing presence wash over him. “How do I know if it’s worth it to take the leap again?”

Andy’s quiet for a moment, her fingers gently brushing through his hair, “It’s worth it because I’ve never seen you _this_ miserable before,” she murmurs. “It’s like it’s physically making you wilt away now that you’re not in contact with him. You haven’t been happy in weeks and you’re slowly becoming a shell of the man you once were.” She shushes his protests, “I know you, Nicolò,” she says firmly, “I _made_ you all those years ago because I saw something in you that deserved more time and I _know_ firsthand how lonely it gets when you have all of this time by yourself.” She tilts his face up so he’s looking up at her, “But you’ve got this chance, this opportunity to have _happiness_ and Nicky, I _need_ you to be happy.”

Nicky blinks up at her slowly, each sluggish movement of his eyelids only making Andy feel more sadness, “Please Nicky. You’ve be alone for so long now; you’ve not truly been happy for probably longer than I’ve noticed. Be selfish for once, alright? Go to Joe and tell him how you feel, let Joe _love_ you like I know you love him.”

He swallows, tongue feeling thick and heavy in his mouth, “Andy,” he mumbles, leaning into her touch. “What’s this all about?” he asks softly.

Her expression hardens again, “I once let the love of my life slip through my fingers,” she says softly, “And every day since that’s happened, I’ve regretted it. Not once have I thought about anyone else but her,” the hard line of her shoulders droop and she lets her arms curl around Nicky’s shoulders, holding him close as she stands above him, “Nicky, please. I don’t want you to experience this eternal pain and regret like I do.”

Nicky closes his eyes tightly, wrapping his arms around Andy’s waist, hugging her tightly.

“Don’t feel sorry for me, little Nico,” she murmurs into his hair, “This burden is mine to carry. Don’t let it become yours too.”

======

Typically, their monthly meetups happen at Joe’s apartment; it’s easier—Joe’s need for his scent to be on _everything_ when in a rut just cements their meetings happening there since Nicky’s instincts aren’t that tied to the need for his scent to be omnipresent.

So, when Nicky finally texts Joe a few days later with a tentative invitation to come over to his place, he’s definitely _nervous_ when Joe’s reply comes back almost instantly.

He inhales, knowing that if he were fully alive, his heart would be beating frantically against his ribcage now, and quickly types out a reply to Joe, a time and a tentative offer for dinner.

Joe’s reply is a single smiling emoji and Nicky feels like _maybe_ things aren’t messed up between them after all.

-

Throwing himself into preparing food for Joe always calms him down, the idea of taking are of Joe makes him happy and content in ways that he can’t really describe and the way that Joe reciprocates it and takes care of him in return makes something warm and pleasant settle in his stomach the more he thinks about it.

The idea of losing Joe permanently to this, to not talking, to not _communicating_ when things get hard between them, it hurts in ways that are comparable to a stake to the heart—an end to Nicky and all that he is.

He grips the knife tighter in his hand, chops the vegetables with a little more fervor than they deserve and tries not to dwell on it, on his mistakes, on the possibility of opening his half-beating heart to this wonderful, beautiful man who seems to love _everything_ about him.

And as the scents of sautéing vegetables and the spices of Joe’s favorite dish surround him, he wonders if Joe will still love everything about him when he _knows_ everything.

Nicky places the knife down and glances out the window, the sun’s just barely settled over the horizon now and soon, all of his best kept secrets will be laid out, everything about him will be laid bare and only then, after Joe knows, will he hope for something happy to come from it all.

======

Joe’s scent is a little muted, dulled and subdued when Nicky lets him into his apartment and _immediately_ , Nicky has to fight the urge to wrap his arms around Joe and hold him until the glum look slides off of his face, until his scent thickens and he smells _happy_ and not _upset_.

(A soft voice in the back of his mind whispers to him, _You did that, Nicolò, you made him feel like that. You should be ashamed._ )

“Joe,” Nicky says softly, taking Joe’s coat and hanging it up, “Thank you for coming over. I’m sorry for the way I left things, I just. I have some reasons for it and I want to explain it to you, even though there’s no excuse for me hurting you the way I did,” he says it all in one breath, staring straight at Joe, his shoulders tense. “I invited you here tonight because I’m ready to talk. And I need to explain something to you, so you understand. And then. I hope we can figure out whatever this is between us.”

Joe looks at Nicky, something relaxing in his face, in his shoulders, “ _Nicolò_ ,” he murmurs, and he makes an aborted motion to reach out for him, “Nicky, thank you for inviting me over. It smells lovely in here.” 

Nicky flushes a little, the tiniest points of pink high on his cheeks, “It’s your favorite,” he mumbles. “Let’s go eat. If anything, I want to at least make sure you’re fed before we talk.”

-

Talking, as it turns out, was harder to do when he no longer had the hustle of dinner to distract him from looking across the table at Joe.

“My feelings on…leaving my heart in someone else’s hands is very complicated,” Nicky says with a slight frown, “I—” he pauses, “I need to move around,” he stands, motioning towards their dishes on the table, “I’m just going to…” he trails off as he starts picking the dishes up, putting some distance between himself and Joe.

“Take whatever time you need, Nicky.”

Nicky’s shoulders sag a little, “I’ve been alive, been like _this_ for a very long time,” he says as he starts loading dishes in the sink, turning the water on to let it get hot, “And when we first met, I mentioned once or twice I think, about a companion and how things didn’t quite work out between us. But I never mentioned the how or why it ended.” 

“It’s kind of long and boring, how our relationship started out because I hated myself, I’d hated what I am. I never really wanted to _end it_ , but I was very careless,” Nicky pauses, shakes his head and Joe watches him as he silently lets the sink fill before he starts plunging plates and silverware into the soapy water before he speaks again, “There was a man. In my long life, I’ve taken on many lovers, but most of them were human until this one particular man.” He goes quiet again as if trying to gather his thoughts, “He was also a werewolf. A very caring and sweet man at first, but he wasn’t quite…all there? I believe? Andy says that he was enchanted by someone else which is why he acted the way he did but, I’m usually good at scenting when someone’s under a spell.”

(Nicky’s earlier words, from their first time together, the sure _I can take care of myself_ echoes inside Joe’s mind almost like a song.)

“Realistically, as I’ve come to figure out after several years of being apart, I have this tendency to get too involved in the people I’m attracted to’s lives. I somehow start courting them—you know about that, yeah? Feeding a potential partner so their blood tastes sweeter, taking care of them when they need it. Slowly molding your schedule around theirs until there’s no way to tell up from down…” he trails off wistfully. “I fall really fast and very hard and that is one of my fatal flaws. Andy certainly points it out to me enough, I’m sure she’d stake me if it wouldn’t break her heart.” He tries to joke, though the words fall a little flat. “Oh right, Andy is the one who made me as I am. She’s much older than me and found me wandering around many many years ago, almost dead. She saw something in me that the world needed though I’m still not sure what exactly that was.”

Nicky’s carefully working his way through the dishes as he talks, trying to keep his voice steady, “Anyway, where was I? Oh right, so. I fell in love with this werewolf even though he didn’t really feel the same as me. He was always a little off, his scent just on the wrong side of right, his taste was something that puzzled me, but I was young and stupid and in love with the only person who’d shown me any type of affection other than Andy.”

Joe can almost _tell_ where this is going even before it gets there, in the way that Nicky’s shoulders tense a little and how he lowers his head as if putting extra focus into scrubbing their forks clean, the sourness that pulls at the edges of his scent.

“I didn’t know until way too late, that there was another man in the picture, someone _controlling_ him, trying to get close to me and in turn, get close to Andy—it was this lonely and sad excuse for a man, who’d been testing various supernatural beings. He wanted to understand how we live for a long time without really aging. He wanted to know why my blood still flows but I’m technically dead.” Nicky purses his lips, “And I was too blinded by my love of the man he was controlling to really _see_ until it was too late.”

The sound of a chair scrapes behind him and Nicky feels the heat of Joe’s body before he realizes that the other man is pressed right against his back, “Andy almost got hurt, she was almost brought to her end because of my selfishness. And I still don’t know how I’ve managed to gain her forgiveness for all of the things I missed. For all the signs that something wasn’t right.” He inhales, sharp and shaky and feels Joe’s hands on his hips, gently tugging him back from the sink and the remaining dishes. “I know that you’re nothing like he was, and you’ve even gotten Andy’s approval despite her never even meeting you,” he breaks off with a weak laugh, “But part of me still _worries_ and it’s so loud sometimes I can’t turn it off. When you brought up me _staying_ during your rut, I’d hoped that maybe it was _just_ the rut talking and that you harbored no feelings for me whatsoever, because that’d make things _easier_.”

When Nicky finally turns around to look at Joe, he knows that every single emotion he feels is projected on his face, from the _love_ to the ugly, nasty anxiety he feels churning in his chest. “But I don’t want easy,” he says quietly, “I don’t want to not know what being with you outside of your ruts and my feedings are like. I want to know everything I can about you Joe, and I want you to know everything about me, even the things that I’ve never told anyone else.”

“Oh Nicky,” Joe finally says, curling a hand around the back of Nicky’s neck, gently pulling him into an embrace, “Nicolò,” he murmurs into his hair as Nicky clings to him. “I’m so sorry you had to go through that. That someone would hurt you in that way—being vulnerable and in love is hard and sometimes we don’t know what we’re getting ourselves into when we start falling for a person. And we become blind by it, my heart. But that’s alright. You’re here now, with me.”

Nicky wraps both of his arms around Joe’s waist, holding onto him tightly, “I’m sorry, Joe,” he whispers. “For leaving you the way I did. For not talking to you sooner. What I just told you doesn’t negate the fact that I hurt you too.” He presses his face into Joe’s shirt, eyes squeezed tight, “I’ll do everything I can to be worthy of your forgiveness,” he mumbles.

Joe tightens his arms around Nicky, “Let me stay tonight,” he whispers into Nicky’s hair, “I’ve missed you. I haven’t been able to sleep without holding you in my arms.”

Nicky makes a quiet noise in his throat, gripping the back of Joe’s shirt in his fingers, knuckles white with the strain, “Please stay,” he mumbles.

======

They eventually part and finished cleaning the kitchen up, carefully packing away leftovers and putting away now dry dishes before they quietly retreat to Nicky’s bedroom.

It’s dark and quiet, a blackout curtain and blind covering the only window in the modestly sized room—all in all, it’s very Nicky, Joe thinks as he watches Nicky part from his side long enough to light a few candles.

“I prefer this kind of light,” Nicky says as he lights several chunky candles sitting on a shelf. “It doesn’t hurt my eyes as much as artificial does,” he smiles, somewhat privately, “Andy says I still live in the times before electricity even though I like to think I’m a _little_ modern.”

“I think it’s perfect,” Joe says, closing the door quietly behind him, the glow of the candles playing off the paleness of Nicky’s skin. “I think when you live as long as we do, you’ve got to accept _some_ modern into your life or else you’ll end up a relic.” 

Nicky can’t stop the soft scoff of laughter that escapes his mouth, “You’re going to get along just fine with Andy,” he says before he can stop himself and Joe feels something in his chest _burst_ with affection as Nicky’s cheeks stain pink and his scent thickens into something sweet and happy.

“ _Nicolò,_ ” Joe murmurs, moving across the room when the need to be close was too great, “I’d love to meet Andy. And I want to introduce you to Booker and Nile,” he murmurs, “They’re like me, they’re my _pack_ ,” he presses his face into Nicky’s hair, “I want our families to know each other and laugh together. I want _us_ to be a family.”

Nicky leans into Joe, closing his eyes, “I want that too,” he admits softly, rubbing Joe’s arms, “I’m tired of denying myself what I want. I want to be selfish about this, about us.” He presses his lips lightly against Joe’s pulse, breathing him in, “I want you.” He whispers.

Joe shivers, running his fingers through Nicky’s hair, “Will you let me love you like you deserve?” he mumbles, tilting his head back further as Nicky’s mouth presses biting kisses along his throat. “Let me take you apart and put you back together until I’m the only one you can think about?”

A low hum and a barely there scrape of teeth against Joe’s skin has him growling softly, “Yes,” Nicky mumbles against his throat, “Will you let me feed?”

“Always, my love,” Joe murmurs, letting Nicky guide him back to the bed, urging him up onto it until he’s sitting back against the headboard. “Do you want me to do anything for you right now?” he asks, carefully helping Nicky out of his shirt as the vampire settles himself into Joe’s lap.

Nicky smiles, soft and sweet as he reaches out to slowly undo the buttons on Joe’s shirt, “Just let me look at you for a moment,” he murmurs, eyes tracking every inch of skin he exposes with each button undone.

Joe’s palms are warm and a little rough as he slides them up Nicky’s back, “I’ll let you look at me for as many lifetimes as you want,” he murmurs, watching with half-lidded eyes as Nicky’s eyes darken, “Love,” he murmurs again, catching Nicky’s attention, “Feel free to tell me no,” he starts, jostling Nicky in his lap a little bit as he pulls him closer until Nicky’s hands are trapped between them, “I want to claim you properly,” he whispers, “I want you to wear my mark so there’s no doubt you belong to me,” he leans up, brushing his lips lightly against Nicky’s parted ones, “Would you let me?”

Nicky kisses Joe fiercely, all clumsy tongue and teeth, his sharpened fang catching on Joe’s lower lip briefly, the sweetness of Joe’s blood exploding across his senses as Joe cups the back of his head and deepens the kiss, licking into his mouth until Nicky has to pull away with a sharp gasp, a warmth spreading through him.

“Let me mark you too,” Nicky mumbles, feeling light headed and blood drunk from just a small amount of Joe’s blood on his tongue, “Let me make you mine too, Yusuf.” He wiggles against Joe’s chest, finally working the rest of the buttons open on his shirt, fingers brushing over warm skin. “Oh Yusuf, please,” he mumbles, mouthing at Joe’s lower lip, tasting the remnants of blood on the newly healed skin.

Joe hums, fingers gentle in Nicky’s hair as he guides his eager mouth away, “Gladly, my love,” he murmurs, gently nudging him down to press frantic kisses to throat, “I want you to bite me where everyone can see,” he whispers, “Show them I belong to you.”

When Nicky’s fangs sink into Joe’s skin, he feels light headed for a moment and then the shocking, startling clarity of _everything_ explodes behind his eyelids and with each pull of blood Nicky takes, Joe’s arousal grows, his hands groping clumsily at Nicky’s back, his hips, his ass, digging his fingers into the muscle there and pulling him forward until Joe can grind against him solidly.

He’s murmuring Nicky’s name, soft praises in various languages, his words flowing together the longer Nicky drinks, something complete and firm settling into his heart, filling all the empty spaces as Nicky’s hips jerk against his, his skin warming where their chests are pressed together—and _fuck_ , feeling Nicky’s body absolutely come _alive_ is one pleasure that Joe will always enjoy.

“Joe,” Nicky mumbles against his throat, taking another careful pull of blood before he slowly detaches himself, licking over the two slightly off center holes, “Oh Joe,” he mumbles, cheeks flushed, a low whine leaving his lips when Joe uses their momentum to tip Nicky over onto the bed, pressing their mouths together in a messy kiss that tastes more of Joe’s blood than Nicky.

Joe shushes Nicky, pressing another kiss to his mouth and then one to his cheek, one to his jaw, “Let me take care of you now,” he murmurs, “Let me see you,” he sits back on his heels, easily moving Nicky where he needs him, “So beautiful and pliant for me,” he smiles, gently removing Nicky’s jeans, leaving him bare.

“ _Joe_ ,” Nicky says, trying to cover himself up, hands cupping around his half-hard dick, whining again when Joe grabs his wrists, pulling his hands aside, “You’ve seen me naked so much, but this feels like it’s so much... _more_.” he mutters with a flush on his cheeks, one that’s spreading slowly down his throat and chest.

Joe grins, “That’s because it is,” he says, pressing both of Nicky’s hands to the bed with a gentle hand, “Keep them there for me, lover. I want to see all of you,” he murmurs, balancing himself on his hands as he leans down for another kiss. “I want to watch you lose yourself to me, until I’m the only one you can even _think_ of.” He bites gently at Nicky’s lower lip, “I want to make you mine, Nicolò.”

Nicky’s hands grasp at the blanket under him, heels sliding against the bed, “Joe please, I need to feel you,” he says with a wounded sound, “There’s lube under the pillow, please my heart. I need you.”

Joe presses a firm kiss to Nicky’s lips before pulling back long enough to get the lube and ditch his own jeans, “Seeing you spread out and desperate for it is almost as good as seeing you in my clothes,” he murmurs, settling between Nicky’s splayed thighs gain, a low, pleased growl leaving his mouth as Nicky rocks his hips upward with tiny, barely there jerks, his half-hard dick nudging pleasantly against Joe’s own fully hard one. 

When Nicky’s like this, it doesn’t take much for him to get ready and by the time Joe’s three fingers deep into Nicky and Nicky’s all out _begging_ for more, he feels a heat under his skin, something possessive in his veins as he pulls his fingers out and slicks his dick up, pressing the tip against Nicky’s hole. “Tell me you want it,” Joe murmurs, squeezing the base of his dick to stop himself from pushing in too quick. “Tell me you’re mine, Nicolò.”

Nicky’s still clawing at the sheets, his chest splotchy and red, sweat beaded at his temples, sliding down the backs of his knees, “Joe please. I want you,” he says with a gasp, feeling the head sink inside slowly, “ _Yusuf_ ,” he groans, trying to push down against him to take more, “Yusuf please give it to me, make me yours,” he begs softly as he feels Joe’s hand still his hips. “ _Joe_.”

Joe has to stop himself, has to _pause_ because everything’s so _much_ and he already feels light headed—Nicky’s body a tight vise around him, warm and slick and _his_ —it makes Joe want to _take_ him until Nicky’s _screaming_ for it.

“Joe please don’t tease me, let me have it, _please_ ,” Nicky mumbles, half out of his mind with pleasure, shaking his head back and forth against the bed. “Wanna feel you inside me. Want you to claim me.”

Joe growls softly, curls a hand around the back of Nicky’s thigh and hoists his ass up into his lap, sinking into him the rest of the way, “Nicolò,” he says, voice dangerously low, pressing their mouths together briefly, “Nicolò, you’re mine,” he forces out between heavy pants, “I’m going to bite you during my next rut,” he promises as he starts fucking into him. “I’m going to bite you where I’ve wanted to bite you since that first night, we were together,” he kisses Nicky again, bites roughly at his lower lip.

Nicky finally wraps his arms around Joe’s shoulders, pulling away from the kiss with a gasp, “I love you Joe,” he says, pressing his face into Joe’s beard, “Yusuf, I love you so much,” he whispers, realizing a few moments later that he’s _crying_.

Crying from pleasure, from happiness, he’s unsure, the only thing he _is_ sure of is the weight of Joe holding him down to the bed and the heat of Joe inside him—their scents intermingling together to create something heady and _right_.

(When Joe comes an indiscernible amount of time later, he murmurs, “I love you too, Nicolò _,”_ into his ear while his knot stretches and stretches and stretches—)

=====

Joe’s a heavy, warm weight against Nicky’s back, half pressing him into the bed where they spoon under the haphazardly thrown blanket.

“Nicolò,” Joe murmurs, warm breath against his cooling skin and Nicky hums, his hand finding Joe’s where it’s warm against his stomach.

“Ask me to stay again,” Nicky says softly, sinking his fingers in between Joe’s, gripping his hand tightly.

Joe hums, nuzzling the back of Nicky’s neck, “Stay with me?” he whispers.

Nicky smiles, settling back against Joe happily, “I’ll stay with you.”

Joe makes a happy sound, pressing a kiss to Nicky’s skin. “Move in with me?”

Nicky laughs this time, soft and fond and happy, “As long as we take my bed.”

Joe pretends to think about it for a moment, their scents happy and thick and heavy around them, “Deal.”


End file.
